We love sports sessions, but only the ones we can shower after. Your toys feel the same — no one likes being sticky and stinky!
Clean toys are essential for your health! If you don’t clean them, you might have some trouble with the ULTIMATE LIFEFORM — BACTERIAAAAAA! Or maybe even fungus… if you’re not a fan of showers.
Keep in mind that non-porous toys are the safest — even cheap ones can develop a really unpleasant odor. Some sellers use so-called ‘jelly rubber’ to disguise PVC or low-quality materials, so always check what your toy is made of.
Fleshlights
For cleaning this strange torch, you must remove the sleeve from its case. Keep using your soap and wash the entire sleeve — DON’T USE COLD OR HOT WATER, only warm. We don’t want to pay for a new toy on the first use, right? Inside the sleeve, use a different type of cleaner — messing up sensations is not our objective.
DON’T FORGET THE CASE! We need to clean it too — we don’t want to be clean for a wedding while our clothes are messed up, right?
After cleaning comes drying. Make sure that inside and outside the toy there isn’t any sign of water. We know lifeforms adapt to any circumstances — if bacteria can live on volcanoes, why couldn’t they live in a sticky, wet place?
Yes, you have to clean them. We know it might sound strange without water, but hear me out. And yes, we know it might sound funny to some troublemakers — please, don’t use your siblings’ towels.
Gently rub your toy — take your time! You don’t want to damage the material.
Grab a towel just for your toy.
Apply a bit of antibacterial soap to it.
Make sure it is perfectly dry after rubbing. We don’t want an electric shock or a fungus colony.
This applies to all types of toys. Make sure that after hiding your toys, they are not near each other. You don’t want to create a new bacteria .
Waterproof Toys
They’re the easiest to clean and dry — the best of the best. They don’t need electronics: when you have that incredible body, you are the motor, you are the Bugatti. But even Bugattis have to be washed.
So grab your dirtiest toy, your favorite, and after using it:
Rinse it in warm water.
Apply a bit of hand soap or antibacterial soap — both work.
Slide your fingers around the entire toy and “Dale Matraca” or “Tocar la zambomba” («jerk your toy»).
After your dirty work is finally done, give it a travel underwater, like a Jules Verne book. Get your towel and soak up the water — now it’s ready for a second round.
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